Quest for Clothes
by soulsearcher
Summary: Written with the help of my awesome, wonderful friend T. Great story for Frodo lovers, taken from a part from ROTK. I beg you to R&R. This is my (and T's, i think) very first lotr fic! R&R, and I will worship you eternally.


Note #1: This is most easily understood if you have read Return of the King (hint: the Tower of Cirith Ungol). This a good story for all Frodo lovers (*drool*), which includes my friend and me. I wrote this with my friend 'T', and just to tell you this: my nickname is Galadriel, hers is Arwen, so, ahem, read and you will discover.. Note #2: Earlier in the book, Frodo was captured by the orcs and taken to the tower of Cirith Ungol. They took everything away from him, including his clothes, but Sam had the ring. Note #3: Sam has always had a HUGE crush on this hobbit named Rosie Cotton.  
  
"Mr. Frodo! Mr. Frodo!" Sam cried as he rushed over to the ragged heap that was his master. He looked weary and had a cut in his hip from the orc's whip. "Sam? Is that you? Am I still dreaming?" "No, you're not dreaming no dream! This is real!" It took some work for Sam to contain his tears of joy.  
  
Arwen sighed with relief. "Oh good, Sam found him." There were small, hidden video cameras set up everywhere in Middle Earth but the elves, just in case. Arwen was monitoring them at the moment, and at the same time having a double-date with Aragorn, and the couple from Rohan and Gondor, Eowyn and Faramir. Aragorn pulled Arwen close. "I told you they would be fine," he said as he watched Frodo and Sam climb down the ladder.  
  
"What about this orc's clothes?" Frodo suggested, still searching for clothing. "No, he has bloodstains on them from previous quarrels. And what with that wound on your hip and all, you could get HIV." "You have a point, Sam," sighed Frodo. "Let's keep searching. And be quick about it." "Yes Mr. Frodo.. Sir.." he looked down. "I believe clothes are necessary." Frodo and Sam continued their search.  
  
Eowyn pointed at the monitor screens from a loving embrace of Faramir. "Weren't they supposed to find clothes a long time ago?" "Yeah, I think so," said Aragorn. "I read the book last night." Faramir turned on the intercom system, wired throughout Mordor. "Yo, Frodo! You're a little late with the clothes! You looking for the latest fashion or something?" "It's not my fault! The stupid orc wasn't supposed to make me bleed!" Frodo yelled back angrily. Faramir settled back into his chair, but noticed Eowyn was gone. She and Arwen were closely watching the monitors, drooling. "Hello.hey, Eowyn, Arwen," Faramir and Aragorn yelled. They didn't badge and the drool on the floor seemed to grow bigger. "Hey, Aragorn or Faramir, can you help me find clothes?" Frodo yelled out. Eowyn whispered, "I love you Frodo.." Faramir jumped up, enraged. "WHAT??!!" he screamed.  
  
On the other side of the monitor screen Frodo and Sam sat together in the cold, but suddenly a whitish figure came. "Frodo sir." Sam whispered. "I reckon we should run, do you see that whitish figure?" Frodo too cold and naked did not stand up and the figure came out of the shadows. "Oh my." Sam looked up in amazement. Before him stood Galadriel, drooling. "So, I finally get to see the true Frodo," she said in her deep, musical voice. "Hey grandma, buzz off!" Arwen yelled from behind. Galadriel twirled around to see Eowyn and Arwen rushing up, pulling each other's hair and shoving each other. "Grrr, awww, owww!" yelled the three girls. "Grandma, you're too old. Take a hike," Arwen screamed. Eowyn got to Frodo first. She grabbed his wrist. "Oh Frodo, I love you," she sighed. Her eyes were misty. "But.uh.what about Faramir?" Frodo said nervously. "Meh, forget that old sock! Now I've seen the whole Frodo!" "So I've heard," Frodo mumbled miserably. Suddenly, Galadriel whipped around and grabbed Frodo's other wrist. "Frodo, you love me, right?" "NO! He loves me!!!" Arwen screamed. All of a sudden, Rosie ran up. "Don't tell me you love him too," Sam moaned, feeling quiet left out. "What? Oh, no Sam!" she cried. "They're so immature. I want a civilized man." She leaped upon Sam and they collapsed in a passionate kiss. "What the." Frodo said, amazed that three girls three times his height were passionately in love with him and SAM actually had a girl. Sam shoved Rosie aside for a second. "Yo! Girls! He still has to destroy the ring!" "Oh yeah." Realization dawned upon them. "See you later, Frodo." Regretfully, they left. And the quest for clothes continued. 


End file.
